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The big PiCTuRe
tOdAy'S cHild

The most important factor in building resilience in children and
helping them process situations is to have loving adults who are there
for them and who are physically, emotionally and spiritually available.

hildren rely on us to figure children will act as if they are not bothered feel safe. The goal here is to try not to
out how to interpret events. by the situation. If so, there is no reason to take away that sense of security they are
Unfortunately, we cannot push them, but tell them you are there to constructing for themselves.
Cprotect our children from the listen when they are ready. Your child may
consequences of COVID-19. However, the have concerns but the overarching current Older children and teens will likely ask for
way we respond and the support we offer need is to have a sense of normalcy. and benefit from additional information
can help buffer the consequences. This Normal at this time of lockdown is tricky about the situation and actions being
can also make it easier for our children to achieve. Discuss achieving ‘normal in taken in the country. Also be sure to open
to bounce back. They listen to our words, lockdown’ with your children; they have conversations about what they are seeing
notice our stress levels and watch what amazing ideas to try. on social media such as Instagram. There
we do. is a lot of nonsense doing the rounds that
• Another way to open the discussion is to needs to be unpacked.
Feeling secure and connected to parents, model your own way of working through
family members, teachers, friends or something. Let your children see you Saying “I do not know” is OK. Do not be
the community is the greatest protection talking, exercising, reading, relaxing and concerned about saying the perfect words,
children have. It builds their resilience observe what happens. Remember little there are no perfect words. It is OK to
now and well into the future. With a eyes are watching all your moves. say you do not know why it is happening
support system in place, we are able to or how to solve it. The main goal is to
keep negative beliefs to a minimum, calm 2. WhaT To Say reinforce that you and your children are
fears, restore ideas around ‘normal’ and More than anything else, we must be safe. Focus on the steps you are taking to
pull together as a family so that we can honest about what is happening. Sadly, become safe. If you can, point out things
all bounce back, and even grow from the COVID-19 is not the kind of truth that we like the social distancing and staying
challenges we are facing. can protect our children from, but the truth home so that doctors and nurses can work
does not need to include every gory detail. to help those infected. They may also be
So, what can we, as parents, do to help How much detail to share will depend on worried about the safety of their friends or
them? their ability to understand. Provide age- extended family. Be honest if you really
appropriate information and only answer do not know, but reassure them that their
1. liSTen To FeaRS anD the questions they ask. There is no need friends' parents are taking care of them.
ConCeRnS to give more information than what would You might tell them about how the doctors,
Listening shows parental love and satisfy their current questions. They will nurses and government are working hard
acceptance as well as helping children come back to ask more when they are to fight against the virus; how the farmers
figure out problems. Children react to mentally, emotionally and psychologically are growing food; the grocery stores are
challenges differently to adults, so start ready to ask more. Young children will still open to ensure we can buy goods or
by asking them what they understand need simple, concrete explanations of how rubbish removal workers are keeping
about what is happening and what what is happening and how it affects our communities clean.
questions/concerns they have. Listen for them. For example, “Why can’t I go
misunderstandings and remember it is and play with Peter yet?” If they have a 3. liMiT eXPoSuRe To The MeDia
common for children to have fears based misunderstanding of events, correct them. Try to monitor and limit your children’s
on information given. Asking children But if you get "It’s just while we have to exposure to media, especially the news
directly what they understand or how they stay safe and not spread the virus, hey and fake news. News coverage is often
feel may not be enough to get them to mom?" then there is no need to add more overwhelming. Ultimately, it may change
voice their feelings. details. Their simple explanations may the way they view the world. They may
• Young children may need your help to be exactly what they need to believe to begin to see it as a scary place. There
find the words to express what they are
feeling. Offer them words to choose from
by telling them it is normal to feel sad,
confused or scared. Be a role model
by sharing how you are feeling and
explaining what you are doing to help
yourself feel better. Encourage them to
express feelings through play, drawing,
storytelling or other creative activities.
• Older children and teens might find it
easier to talk about what others think. "My
friend Sarah said that she feels afraid.
Isn't she weird?" When this occurs, do not
remove the mask by saying, "I'll bet you
are really feeling weird too." Rather talk
about what Sarah must be feeling and
how it is understandable. Ask your child
what Sarah’s mom and dad could do to
make her feel more secure.
• Try not to force your child to talk. Some

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