Page 30 - Dainfern Precinct Living 1 2021

LIFESTYLE

DATING 101

In an age filled with
social media, Tinder

and virtual dating,

are we creating the
proper foundations

for a healthy
relationship?

BY MICHELLE RAYMOND

his seems to be the time of
high-speed relationships, where
one can simply, with the brush
Tof a finger, swipe and instantly
decide on the fates of potential partners.
Call me old-fashioned, but it takes a
lot more than a mere gesture to find
love. Not that I have anything against
dating apps. Many of my close friends
have found true love with the help of
technology. But what is often overlooked
is that this is just the first step in the long
journey to love and marriage.
What were you like as a child? What lessons did your parents teach
Let’s fast forward a bit. Those who have How was your childhood? you about money?
been in love know how euphoric it is, What values does your family have? Do you value spending or saving, and
but what happens when the honeymoon How does your family celebrate special why?
phase passes? What happens when you occasions?
move from in love to just love? Have a chat with a long-term, happily
Babysit a friend’s or family member’s married couple.
Many people will argue that love is kids together. Ask them:
enough, but is it? Those who are in You can ask each other questions like: What is their secret ingredient to a
a long-term relationship or stable How did your parents discipline you? happy marriage?
marriages will tell you that when times How did you feel about it? What advice can they give you?
get tough, or money gets tight, or Do you want kids? How do they keep the romance alive?
when someone falls ill, or when babies
arrive – love is just not enough. The Do a competitive activity together. This all may seem like a lot of effort (and
relationship requires compassion, Competition can tell you a lot about his/ totally unromantic) for dating, but just
understanding, communication, her character. like a house needs a solid foundation
honesty, respect and the willingness to last through the storms, so do
to make it work. And it takes guts! Take a turn to prepare and cook a relationships.
Marriage is not for sissies (neither is meal.
parenting for that matter). Ask each other: Marriage and children may not be future
Who did the cooking in your house? pursuits for you, and that is ok. It is ok
Life is complicated enough without the What foods do you love? to be single. It is ok to be married and
added stress of unhealthy relationships. Did your family sit down together for not have children. It is also ok to not
So to set yourself up for success while meals? be married and have children. Your life
still in the courtship phase, here are Who cleaned up and why? is yours to live and experience – just
some great guidelines to help you make sure you live it with integrity and
decide whether or not your partner is Budget for a holiday or a day out. gratitude.
right for you. Money is often the reason couples fight.
Gaining an understanding of what your Michelle is a life and wellness
Spend a day going through your partner believes about money early on guide, mentor and coach based in
photo albums and baby pictures with can save you in more ways than one. Fourways. For more information, or
your partner. Ask each other questions Money should never be a taboo subject
like: in a committed relationship. Start the to get in touch, visit
Where did you grow up? conversation now by asking: www.achievegreatness.co.za

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DPL