Page 26 - IFV September Issue 2025

Lifestyle

mAKiNG SENSE OF ChANGE:

FiNdiNG mEANiNG iN LiFE’S

tRANSitiONS

BY VANESSA CROUS, NARRATIVE COUNSELLOR

ife has a way of shifting • Are there moments - however small
beneath our feet. Sometimes - where I’ve responded with strength
Lchange arrives with celebration or wisdom?
in the form of graduations, weddings, • What values are becoming clearer to
retirement. Other times, it shows up me in this time?
quietly or painfully - a job loss, the end • Who in my life has supported or
of a relationship, the death of someone witnessed my growth?
dear, or simply the slow evolution • What kind of story do I want to live
of aging. Whether welcomed or into next?
unwelcome, transitions often leave us These questions aren’t meant to
with questions: Who am I now? Where pressure you into quick answers, but to
do I belong? What remains of the life I open gentle doorways of curiosity.
knew, and what do I carry forward?
As a narrative counsellor, I walk A gentle reminder
alongside people during these uncertain Transitions can stir up grief, uncertainty
moments—not to “fix” anything, but and longing, but they also hold within
to listen for meaning, possibility and them the seeds of possibility. You are
strength in their unfolding story. not “starting over”; you are continuing,
evolving. The next part of your story
The in-between space these inherited stories no longer serve doesn’t need to be written all at once. It
Transitions can feel disorienting because us. begins in small moments of noticing: the
they often place us in what some call a For example, someone moving into things that still matter, the relationships
“liminal space” - a threshold between retirement might struggle with the that nourish you, the parts of yourself
what was and what will be. This space story that their worth was tied to their you’re beginning to rediscover.
can feel empty, confusing, even lonely. productivity. A person healing from You don’t have to navigate this alone.
But it can also be fertile ground for divorce may carry a story that they have Narrative counselling offers a safe,
reflection and change. “failed” or are “not lovable.” Narrative respectful space where your voice is
In narrative counselling, we see these counselling helps us gently question heard and honoured—and where your
in-between times not as problems to be these dominant stories and explore story is treated with the care it deserves.
solved, but as rich narrative moments— hidden ones - stories of courage, loyalty, You are the author. This chapter may
opportunities to pause, take stock and resourcefulness and hope. be unfamiliar, but it is yours to shape -
consider which parts of your story you When we begin to re-author our story, with dignity, imagination and meaning.
want to carry forward, and which you we don’t erase what’s come before - we
may want to leave behind. reinterpret it in a way that honours our “The person is not the
resilience and opens up new paths.
Re-authoring the story problem. The problem
Each of us lives within a story - often Questions to reflect on
shaped by culture, family and early life If you’re going through a transition is the problem.”
experiences. These stories tell us who right now, consider these questions: – MICHAEL WHITE
we are, what we should value and how • What story have I been telling myself
we’re meant to live. But sometimes about this change? vanessacrouscounselling.co.za

24 • September 2025 • The Villager