Page 39 - Waterfall City Issue 7 July 2024

It’s important that you help your child
articulate what is happening to them.
How you do this will depend on their age.

Signs your child is being or going for a milkshake and having a
bullied good talk.
Children often suffer in silence, and
some parents put their child’s self- Look at where your child is thriving
isolation or moodiness down to and consider the subjects or activities
feared that reporting it could make the hormones, teenage angst or a phase that interest them. If they have a hobby
situation worse. In South Africa, there is they are going through. It is essential they’re passionate about or if they are
a lot of pressure on children and adults that you as a parent encourage open involved in a favourite sport, help them
not to be labelled a “snitch”, hence the and honest communication with your use this as a channel for positivity and
apathy shown by our society towards child and make this a normal part of affirmation.
whistleblowers. the family dynamic.
Equip your child with knowledge about
Interestingly, only 4% of kids surveyed If your child is uncharacteristically the dangers of the online world – it’s
said that they knew someone who had bad-tempered, avoids school, avoids similar to warning them about stranger
been bullied. This is because bullies can discussing school or shows a dramatic danger. Help them to navigate social
be subtle and often ensure that their shift in their academic performance, media in a responsible way and be sure
actions are not seen, or when they are it is cause for concern. Physical signs to take an interest in their online life.
in public, their bullying behaviour is such as cuts or bruises, unexplained This can be tough when you have older
disguised as horseplay and the victim damage, or the loss of their belongings teens; the solution is to keep a healthy
is too embarrassed to speak out, often are also red flags. channel of communication wide open.
chuckling along just to fit in.
What to do when your child The internet is ruthless – once
Twenty years ago, if a child was being is being bullied something is out there, there is no
bullied at school, going home at the The most important thing you can do taking it back. Children need to realise
end of the school day was a reprieve. is listen and let your child feel heard. this, and they should never say or post
But in today’s world, the bully follows Personalise it by sharing your own anything online that they wouldn’t
the child into the sanctity of their experiences if you were bullied as a share in person.
private space, thanks to social media. child, but be careful not to undermine
Incidents of cyberbullying are on the their experience by implying that it If your child is being taunted or bullied
rise and unfortunately, legislation has is normal behaviour that every child online – be it by someone they know or
lagged when it comes to seeking legal needs to deal with. a stranger – understand that they need
recourse. to feel safe in order to speak up about
Speak to your child’s teacher and seek it. This means that you as a parent need
Even with the introduction of the guidance, but don’t confront the bully to be open-minded. Never retaliate
Cybercrimes Act – which aims to or the bully’s parents. It is natural for by belittling the child’s enjoyment of
reduce and prevent cybercrime in parents to be defensive and protect online gaming or social media. It is part
South Africa – it is difficult to avoid their children, but this will not fix of their world, and they must learn to
cyberbullying and to seek help. anything. navigate it safely.

Consequences of bullying You must also seek the necessary If you suspect or discover that your
The effects of bullying on the victim’s support for your child and yourself child is bullying another child, it is
emotional and mental health are so as to equip them with the tools just as important to seek expert help
far-reaching. The victim can lose their they need to handle the situation. and support. It’s about getting to the
self-esteem and spiral into a state of Counselling is highly recommended. root of the problem so that it doesn’t
depression and anxiety. This leads become a long-term issue. Also, it’s
to further consequences such as It’s important that you help your child important for you to assure your child
substance abuse, self-mutilation, or articulate what is happening to them. that you love them unconditionally
even suicide. Sometimes the victim is How you do this will depend on their and to guide them on how to go about
forced to move to a different school to age. Methods include getting the child setting matters right with the people
escape the constant humiliation. to draw and describe their pictures they’ve bullied.

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