Page 7 - Cornwall Issue 4 2025
P. 7

HEALTH & WELLBEING


                          MAKING SENSE





                                   OF CHANGE







                 FINDING MEANING IN LIFE’S TRANSITIONS




                 BY VANESSA CROUS, NARR ATIVE COUNSELLOR • PHOTO BY IVAN MULLER



                          ife has a way of shifting beneath our   QUESTIONS TO REFLECT ON
                          feet. Sometimes change arrives with   If you're going through a transition right now,
                          celebration in the form of graduations,   consider these questions:
                   Lweddings, retirement. Other times, it shows   • What story have I been telling myself about this
                   up quietly or painfully - a job loss, the end of a   change?
                   relationship, the death of someone dear, or simply
                   the slow evolution of aging. Whether welcomed   • Are there moments - however small - where I’ve
                   or unwelcome, transitions often leave us with   responded with strength or wisdom?
                   questions: Who am I now? Where do I belong?
                   What remains of the life I knew, and what do I carry   • What values are becoming clearer to me in this
                   forward?
                                                               time?
                   As a narrative counsellor, I walk alongside people
                   during these uncertain moments—not to “fix”   • Who in my life has supported or witnessed my
                                                               growth?
                   anything, but to listen for meaning, possibility and
                   strength in their unfolding story.
                                                               • What kind of story do I want to live into next?
                   THE IN-BETWEEN SPACE
                   Transitions can feel disorienting because they often   These questions aren’t meant to pressure you into
                   place us in what some call a “liminal space” - a   quick answers, but to open gentle doorways of
                   threshold between what was and what will be. This   curiosity.
                   space can feel empty, confusing, even lonely. But it
                   can also be fertile ground for reflection and change.  A GENTLE REMINDER
                   In narrative counselling, we see these in-between   Transitions can stir up grief, uncertainty and
                   times not as problems to be solved, but as rich   longing, but they also hold within them the seeds
                   narrative moments—opportunities to pause, take   of possibility. You are not “starting over”; you are
                   stock and consider which parts of your story you   continuing, evolving. The next part of your story
                   want to carry forward, and which you may want to   doesn’t need to be written all at once. It begins
                   leave behind.                               in small moments of noticing: the things that still
                                                               matter, the relationships that nourish you, the parts
                   RE-AUTHORING THE STORY                      of yourself you’re beginning to rediscover.
                   Each of us lives within a story - often shaped by
                   culture, family and early life experiences. These   You don’t have to navigate this alone. Narrative
                   stories tell us who we are, what we should value   counselling offers a safe, respectful space where
                   and how we’re meant to live. But sometimes these   your voice is heard and honoured—and where your
                   inherited stories no longer serve us.       story is treated with the care it deserves.

                   For example, someone moving into retirement   You are the author. This chapter may be unfamiliar,
                   might struggle with the story that their worth was   but it is yours to shape  - with dignity, imagination
                   tied to their productivity. A person healing from   and meaning.
                   divorce may carry a story that they have “failed”
                   or are “not lovable.” Narrative counselling helps    “The person is not the problem. The problem is the
                   us gently question these dominant stories and   problem.” – Michael White
                   explore hidden ones - stories of courage, loyalty,
                   resourcefulness and hope.
                                                                 CONTACT DETAILS
                   When we begin to re-author our story, we don’t   Tel: 082 324 9735
                   erase what’s come before - we reinterpret it in a   www.vanessacrouscounselling.co.za
                   way that honours our resilience and opens up new   Address: 414 Cliff Avenue, Waterkloof Ridge
                   paths.



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