Page 31 - FWG Issue 5 June 2024

Today’s Child

It’s important that you help your child articulate what is
happening to them. How you do this will depend on their age.

hence the apathy shown by our society academic performance, it is cause for should never say or post anything online
towards whistleblowers. concern. Physical signs such as cuts or that they wouldn’t share in person.
bruises, unexplained damage, or the loss
Interestingly, only 4% of kids surveyed of their belongings are also red flags. If your child is being taunted or bullied
said that they knew someone who had online – be it by someone they know or
been bullied. This is because bullies can What to do when your child is being a stranger – understand that they need
be subtle and often ensure that their bullied to feel safe in order to speak up about it.
actions are not seen, or when they are The most important thing you can do This means that you as a parent need to be
in public, their bullying behaviour is is listen and let your child feel heard. open-minded. Never retaliate by belittling
disguised as horseplay and the victim Personalise it by sharing your own the child’s enjoyment of online gaming or
is too embarrassed to speak out, often experiences if you were bullied as a child, social media. It is part of their world, and
chuckling along just to fit in. but be careful not to undermine their they must learn to navigate it safely.
experience by implying that it is normal
Twenty years ago, if a child was being behaviour that every child needs to deal If you suspect or discover that your
bullied at school, going home at the with. child is bullying another child, it is just
end of the school day was a reprieve. as important to seek expert help and
But in today’s world, the bully follows Speak to your child’s teacher and seek support. It’s about getting to the root of
the child into the sanctity of their guidance, but don’t confront the bully or the problem so that it doesn’t become a
private space, thanks to social media. the bully’s parents. It is natural for parents long-term issue. Also, it’s important for
Incidents of cyberbullying are on to be defensive and protect their children, you to assure your child that you love
the rise and rise, and unfortunately, but this will not fix anything. them unconditionally and to guide them
legislation has lagged when it comes on how to go about setting matters right
to seeking legal recourse. You must also seek the necessary support with the people they’ve bullied.
for your child and yourself so as to equip
Even with the introduction of the them with the tools they need to handle
Cybercrimes Act – which aims to the situation. Counselling is highly
reduce and prevent cybercrime in recommended.
South Africa – it is difficult to avoid
cyberbullying and to seek help. It’s important that you help your child
articulate what is happening to them.
Consequences of bullying How you do this will depend on their age.
The effects of bullying on the victim’s Methods include getting the child to draw
emotional and mental health are far- and describe their pictures or going for a
reaching. The victim can lose their milkshake and having a good talk.
self-esteem and spiral into a state of
depression and anxiety. This leads Look at where your child is thriving and
to further consequences such as consider the subjects or activities that
substance abuse, self-mutilation, or even interest them. If they have a hobby they’re
suicide. Sometimes the victim is forced to passionate about or if they are involved in
move to a different school to escape the a favourite sport, help them use this as a
constant humiliation. channel for positivity and affirmation.

Signs your child is being bullied Equip your child with knowledge about
Children often suffer in silence, and some the dangers of the online world – it’s
parents put their child’s self-isolation or similar to warning them about stranger
moodiness down to hormones, teenage danger. Help them to navigate social
angst or a phase they are going through. It media in a responsible way and be sure
is essential that you as a parent encourage to take an interest in their online life. This
open and honest communication with can be tough when you have older teens;
your child and make this a normal part of the solution is to keep a healthy channel of
the family dynamic. communication wide open.

If your child is uncharacteristically bad- The internet is ruthless – once something
tempered, avoids school, avoids discussing is out there, there is no taking it back.
school or shows a dramatic shift in their Children need to realise this, and they

Fourways Gardens • 29 • June 2024