Page 13 - IFV Issue 6 June 2024

Humour

FISH AND ROCKET SCIENTISTS

BY JAMES CLARKE

Photo by Jakub Kapusnak on Unsplash

octors now agree that mum As an animal’s body gets bigger the It seems to be no coincidence that
was right – eat fish because brain gets bigger, though not at the the world’s earliest signs of humans
Dit’s good for the brain. same rate. A large but not terribly bright engaging in creative activities – making
More than that, there’s now a mammal, like a rhino, typically has a decorative necklaces, water vessels and
suggestion that early humans living brain about 0.4 percent of the body advanced stone artifacts – are along the
along the South African coast and weight. Cape coast.
consequently eating lots of fish were Humans broke the rule by having a So it wasn’t simply shambling
more intelligent than humans living large body AND a large brain - about 2 beetle-browed humans that eventually
inland living off meat and veggies. percent of our body weight. migrated from Africa - it was intelligent
And women, because they ate a great Our coastal ancestors had access to a humans.
deal more shellfish than men – after all high quality food to feed their brains - Parkington, during a lecture, once
they were the gatherers – were probably fish. held aloft an apple and perlemoen
brighter than their men folk. Brain development is driven by what a shell and said, “Homo sapiens (‘man
Ichthyologist Professor Mike Bruton, pregnant mother eats while she is breast the wise’) probably came about not in
who is now a generalist dedicated to feeding her baby. And the key nutrients some Middle East orchard but on a Cape
promoting science here and in the needed are polyunsaturated fatty acids beach”.
Middle East, recently gave a talk about (PUFAs) without which “children are Gonzales, the fishmonger, would
fish and brains in Cape Town. irremediably mentally and visually agree with all this.
He focused his talk on studies by a disadvantaged”. A customer who marvelled at how
friend – archaeologist, Professor John PUFAs are uncommon in the meat of quick-witted and intelligent he was
Parkington at the University of Cape terrestrial animals such as antelope but asked him: “What makes you so clever
Town. Parkington suggested that fish very common in marine and freshwater Mr Gonzales?”
– especially shellfish – because they fish and shellfish. Gonzales said, “Fish heads. Eat enough
provide an important nutrient for the Bruton says coastal women habitually and you’ll be positively brilliant. Only
brain led to the emergence of the first gathered and ate large amounts of R40 apiece.”
really intelligent humans. shellfish while men wasted their time The customer bought three. A
Parkington studied pre-historic hunter- and energy hunting down sirloins and week later he complained they were
gatherer people living along the west chops that provided few nutrients for disgusting and he didn’t feel any
coast where one finds the world’s largest brain development. smarter.
middens of discarded shells. He was Seafood allowed Homo erectus (the “You didn’t eat enough,” said Gonzales.
researching a period of time that began species that preceded our species, The customer went home with 20 more.
before humans migrated from Africa. Homo sapiens) to accelerate brain Two weeks later he was back – and
Mike Bruton says big-brained humans development so infusing the human angry.
took a different route in evolution to that race with a greater intelligence “Hey, Gonzales,” he said, “you’re selling
of other large mammals. Interpreting allowing them to eventually become me fish heads for R40 a piece when I
Parkington he described how the rocket scientists, lawyers, doctors and can buy the whole fish for that. You’re
human species “invested in the process computer programmers and their ripping me off!”
of developing a large brain and skull to children to send sms messages to each “You see?” said Gonzales. “You’re
contain it”. other simply by using their thumbs. smarter already!”

The Villager • Issue 6 2024 • 11