Page 29 - Silver Lakes September 2021

HELLO RAISING CHILDREN FOR THE
TODAY’S CHILD

UNKNOWN FUTURE

By Nicoleen Davies, Director of Business Development, Life Talk
Spring Wto cope with what life throws at development. If they see you lose your and actions. Verbally reward your child

e all want our children to be
for striving for new experiences and
temper easily, or shout at people when
happy, secure, fulfilled and able
encourage them to turn curiosity into
things go wrong, or give up at the first
action.
them. So, how do we set that foundation?
hurdle, or don’t appreciate things or
they. Fact.
Something that I have often pondered
over 20 years showed that socially
is – how do you raise children for the people, or have a poor work ethic – so will • Teach social skills. A study conducted
competent children who, without
unknown, for a world that doesn’t exist SUCCESSFUL PARENTING - WHAT prompting could cooperate with their
yet, for a life of constant and rapid change, THE PROFESSIONALS SAY peers and were helpful towards others,
of complexity? Studies indicate that successful adults had greater empathy and were better
had the following common grounding able to resolve problems on their own.
The key skills they would probably need as children, and some of these are They were more likely to complete a
are resilience and adaptability but, in surprisingly simple things: university degree and have a full-time
CELEBRATE WITH US AT CAFE 41 addition, psychologists have identified job by the age of 25 than those with
several factors that may ensure success. • Raise your children with a ‘can do’ limited social skills. Conversely, limited
We have nothing else to work with other versus a ‘can’t do’ attitude. This will social skills present a higher risk of
than what current studies and theories encourage them to become self-starters reckless behaviour, resulting in binge
predict, so this is what the experts suggest. and action oriented. drinking, or using drugs and being
arrested.
WE ARE OUR CHILDREN’S ROLE • Let your children do chores. If they don’t • Set higher expectations of them. This
MODELS do them, someone else has too. Chores talks to the Pygmalion effect, which
reinforce that work needs to be done
Parenting has a direct influence on and, in so doing, each of us contributes. states that what one person expects
developing a child’s capabilities. We all This helps develop collaboration skills of another can come to serve as a self-
know how important it is to spend time and empathy - because they know what fulfilling prophecy. Basically, this means
with our children and that they learn it takes, how to work independently, that expectations parents hold for their
how to behave by observing the adults and it teaches them the importance of children have a huge effect on them
in their lives. It is irrefutable that you will responsibility. It may also teach them attaining goals. We are certainly not
have a major impact on how your children negotiation skills! promoting undue pressure being placed
conduct themselves in adulthood. on children, but it is about visualising a
• Encourage curiosity. Free time used for future state and then encouraging them
Being aware of this in your daily self-exploration will create the space for to work towards that. The goal posts
may move, but moving forward and not
interactions will be crucial to their your child to cultivate creative thoughts standing still is the point.
• Complexity is the future so future
success may be determined by a
person’s ‘complexipacity’, a word
coined by David Pierre Snyder. This
trait describes an individual's ability to
innovate and disrupt in complex, open
and people-intensive environments,
with feedback loops and unintended
consequences. Encourage your children
to break challenges down into a set
of questions; to think about each one
through various perspectives; and to
find answers from experts.

• Focus on healthy relationships at
home. Research shows that children
T’S & C’S APPLY to fare worse than children with parents
brought up in high conflict homes tend
that get along. Conflict is destabilising
and creates insecurity and doubt in
young minds.

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INTRA MUROS SEPTEMBER 2021 27