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LIFESTYLE

BUILDING RESILIENCE IN CHILDREN

DESPITE COVID 19

by Dr Ilse Ruane

he most important factor in building Listen to fears and concerns weird?” When this occurs, do not remove the
resilience in children and helping them Listening shows parental love and acceptance mask by saying, “I’ll bet you are really feeling
Tprocess situations is to have loving adults as well as helping children gure out problems. weird too.” Rather talk about what Sarah must
who are there for them and who are physically, Children react to challenges di erently to adults. be feeling and how it is understandable. Ask
emotionally and spiritually available. Children After physical reassurance and a good hug, ask your child what Sarah’s mom and dad could
rely on us to gure out how to interpret events. children what they understand about what do to make her feel more secure.
Unfortunately, we cannot protect our children is happening and what questions/concerns • Try not to force your child to talk. Some
from the consequences of COVID-19. However, they have. Listen for misunderstandings and children will act as if they are not bothered
the way we respond and the support we o er remember it is common for children to have by the situation. If so, there is no reason to
can help bu er the consequences. This can fears based on information given. Asking push them, but tell them you are there to
also make it easier for our children to bounce children directly what they understand or how listen when they are ready. Your child may
back. They listen to our words, notice our stress they feel may not be enough to get them to have concerns but the overarching current
levels and watch what we do. Feeling secure voice their feelings. need is a sense of normalcy. Normal at this
and connected to parents, family members, time of lockdown is tricky to achieve. Discuss
teachers, friends or community is the greatest • Young children may need your help to nd achieving “normal in lockdown” with your
protection children have. It builds their the words to express what they are feeling. children; they have amazing ideas to try.
resilience now and well into the future. With O er them words to choose from by telling • Another way to open the discussion is to
a support system in place, you will be able to them it is normal to feel sad, confused or model your own way of working through
keep negative beliefs to a minimum, calm fears, scared. Be a role model by sharing how something. Let your children see you talking,
restore ideas around ‘normal’ and pull together you are feeling and explaining what you exercising, reading, relaxing and observe
as a family so that we all may bounce back, and are doing to help yourself feel better. what happens. Remember little eyes are
even grow from the challenges we are facing. Encourage them to express feelings through watching our moves.
play, drawing, storytelling or other creative
So, what can we, as parents, activities. What to say
do to help them? • Older children and teens might nd it easier More than anything else, we must be honest
to talk about what others think. “My friend about what is happening. Sadly, COVID-19
Sarah said that she feels afraid. Isn’t she is not the kind of truth that we can protect

24 • Issue 2 2020 • BLUE VALLEY NEWS