Page 15 - IFV Issue 9_2023

So, how exactly can you as a parent
help your children navigate uncharted
territory? Here are some suggestions:

1. Listen to your child’s concerns
Listening shows parental love and
acceptance of your child, and it can
help them work through a problem.
Understand that teens react to challenges
differently from adults. Their timing in
terms of having a discussion with you
about something is unpredictable, so be
aware of when a conversation is opening
up.
Also, if you as the parent feel there is
an issue that needs to be discussed, start
the conversation. Ask your teen what be experimentation with alcohol and negative influences in order to prevent
they understand about the issue and smoking; personality and physical your child from starting a bad habit – or
what questions or concerns they have. changes occur. It’s hard for a teenager at least prevent the habit from getting
Depending on the family dynamics, you to gauge what normality is during this worse.
can start the process or wait for your child phase. What’s also concerning is that As difficult as it is, try to monitor and
to do so. they tend to rely on their friends for limit your teen’s exposure to social
When an opportunity for opening a information – friends who are just as media. The world is constantly presented
discussion presents itself, listen out for confused as they are. on social platforms in a certain way. We
any misunderstandings. Remember: it is If you suspect your teen is struggling know that this is a fake world of false
common for teens to have fears based on with something but isn’t opening up, glamour that can expose your child to the
the information at their disposal and on provide a learning opportunity by dangers of alcohol and drug use, bullying,
the limited life experience they have. As showing them how you are working trafficking, sexual and emotional
stated, timing with teens is everything. through something. Let your child see exploitation, and sheer manipulation.
When they bring up something, be ready. what you do to overcome a challenge. It’s essential that you warn them of these
They may bring up “a friend’s problem”. Let them see you struggle with that dangers because they may feel a great
This is a wonderful learning opportunity challenge and what you put in place to need to subscribe to whatever is online
because the friend’s problem provides bring about a resolution – this includes due to peer pressure.
emotional distance. It allows for the who you call on for assistance and whose
problem to be externalised, so it can be input you do not concern yourself with. 3. Relationships and friendships
discussed more openly and proactively. Explain why you value one person’s Be vigilant about who your teens are
When discussing the problem, ask opinion over another’s. hanging out with. This is tricky because
for your teen’s input; don’t just air your Whichever way you choose to unpack there are friends we do not want our
views. We want to help them develop these issues with your teen, the idea children to associate with. However, if
their thought processes around tackling behind it is the same: to enable them you forbid your child from engaging in
problems. For this to happen, we need to understand the process behind how such associations, they may rebel and
to allow them the space to express decisions are made. Hopefully, they have seek out these people intentionally.
themselves so that their way of reasoning received a practical learning opportunity. Your best hope is that through the
and any shortcomings come to light. learning opportunities you present to
Don’t force your teen to talk. Some 2. Limit your child’s exposure to your child, you’ve created a space where
teens will act as if they are not bothered social media they can distinguish decent people from
by the situation. If so, there is no reason Open up conversations about what your bad influencers and know whom to keep
to push them. Just tell them that you are teenager is seeing on social media. Be at a distance. A pivotal lesson to teach a
there to listen when they are ready. aware of the allure of early drinking and teen is that every valuable relationship
Teenage life is new, strange and vaping, for example, that is promoted can be predicated on the word “no”. If a
daunting. Romance can start blooming in the virtual world. You’ll need to learn friend will not take “no” for an answer, then
and take on a physical form; there may how to navigate your child’s exposure to that friendship shouldn’t last, especially

The Villager • Issue 9 2023 • 13