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TODAY'S CHILD

MINDFUL

PARENTING

by Nicoleen Davies,
Director, Life Talk Forum

indfulness is the new buzz word balance of work, deadlines, seemingly made mistakes will be mirrored in
and in an age of increasing chaos no time, fatigue, maybe financial strain, a their behaviour. Instead of instinctively
Mand busyness it should really be social life, exercise, school commitments… shouting and punishing them (which
something we all practice. Mindfulness all whilst trying to do right by your never yields long-term, positive results),
is increased consciousness, being fully children, raise them well and give them calm yourself, change your perspective
aware of what you are doing, moment- opportunities in a world that is always and use the moment, the transgression,
to-moment, of your actions and thoughts, demanding more of them. In addition, as a learning moment. This will move your
perhaps bodily sensations, all within parents have to include managing parenting style from being negative and
your environment. Mindfulness is used in the challenges of social media in their reactive to proactive and far more positive.
stress-relieving, calming meditation and parenting skill-set. The principle behind mindful parenting is
now even mindful eating, which is actively to teach rather than punish; and empower
thinking about and planning what you eat, Often, because parents are overwhelmed rather than threaten.
is a new approach to healthy eating. or just simply too busy and thinly stretched,
it is easier to let things slip, to overlook Reactive parents tend to be commanding,
We believe this same mindfulness negative or inappropriate behaviour authoritarian and perhaps intimidating.
should be applied to parenting in the or lack of co-operation. That is never a This could drive a wedge between you and
form of proactive, conscious parenting. good idea. Children will test boundaries. your children as they grow older. They may
This requires being mindful in everyday Once children realise they can get away feel that they can’t turn to you when they
interactions with your children, being non- with things and push those boundaries need help because you won’t understand,
judgemental, attentive and importantly, because there are no consequences, you you won’t listen, you will shout or you will
not overreacting when things go wrong. can be sure that they will continue along blame them.
This approach helps to shift the focus to that trajectory and the transgressions will
positive parenting which will not only potentially become more serious. Proactive parenting involves regular,
improve the well-being of your children, healthy conversations and sharing. These
but you will benefit too. Transform negative behaviour into are far more conducive to building a
learning moments strong, supportive relationship to help
The Parenting Challenge Children learn through observation, navigate the complex teen and early
Let’s face it, parenting is hard work! It’s a so how you behave when they have adulthood years.

36 INTRA MUROS FEBRUARY 2020