Page 15 - Dainfern Precinct Living Issue 4 May 2023

Home Front
We have done
well as a parent
”
when our children
learn to become
responsible for
themselves.
”
When I initially came across this concept, I was
sceptical - I saw it as another new-aged philosophy.
But once I got over the well-marketed phrasing of
the name and started to explore the lessons and
teachings, I was blown away.
When I initially came
across this concept, I
was sceptical - I saw it
as another new-aged
philosophy. But once
I got over the well-
marketed phrasing of
the name and started
to explore the lessons
BY MICHELLE L RAYMOND
and teachings, I was
blown away.
6 DPL issue 10 2022
8 DPL issue 11 2022
8 DPL issue 5 2022
12 DPL issue 4 2023
here is no handbook for raising babies are generally incredibly tuned
children and yet the process in to themselves and the environment.
to get a tertiary qualification, They have not learned fear and self-
Ta driver’s license or married doubt so they are free to be exactly who
requires time and money spent in they need to be.
preparation to attain these things.
Anyone can have children, regardless of Unfortunately, many of us have come
their education, wealth or status. So how
from families and cultures where
do we create a world that is favourable children are seen, not heard, and the
for children to be born into and what are perception is that they need to be
taught how to change their behaviour
the principles to live by?
This is where Conscious Parenting into something that will suit the ideals
and lifestyles the adults want. From
comes in. It is first and foremost a deep past generations to today, the cycle
continues.
look into ourselves, not as parents,
but as individuals. With our past, our What if we changed our perspective from
behaviours, our habitual patterns and
our upbringing, can we raise children command-and-control and tapped into
to be self-aware, independent and the wisdom that children can offer us? If
generally good people? The answer is
we give them a chance, they can remind
yes, but it takes work - inner work. us of some of the most valuable lessons
in life - like how to love unconditionally
I’ve outlined 3 important concepts of (nobody does that better than a child),
what it means to be a Conscious Parent. how to be present (children have not
These might be completely contrary to learnt how to worry about the past and
what you think and will challenge you as future), and how to live with a sense of
they did me. But to see things clearly, ease and confidence that only comes
we first need to clean and demystify our from embracing our true creative nature.
lens that views the world.
LOVE LESS
DO LESS Who doesn’t love holding a new-born
As parents, we - more often than not baby? Having something in our arms that
- want to give our children a better life is so innocent and fragile connects to a
than what we have, or had, so we give very primal force within us - the need to
more of our time, money and energy, nurture and/ or to leave a legacy.
and we consider ourselves fortunate
to be able to do this, to give the next Love is something that is often
generation a better footing in life. The misunderstood. We may have cravings
intentions are always good and pure, for security, or the need to feel
but sometimes we are blinded by the needed. Flattery, or infatuation may be
fear, hurt or lack we experienced, so misinterpreted. Perhaps it was from a
we overcompensate in our actions. need to be loved that we smother, or
Ultimately, the best thing any parent can from a need to be heard that we become
do for their child(ren) is to give them the overbearing, or from a need for power
space to unfold and discover who they that we become the dictators in our
are, what they are passionate about homes, or perhaps from a traumatic
and where they can serve. Of course, childhood that we lash out - and all this
the major challenge here is that we, in the name of love. Perhaps if we had to
as parents, are not fully actualised. love a little less, we could create some
Many of us are still bound by past space between our inner-demons and
conditionings and a narrow view of the our children. After all, our children are
world. This is one of the main causes of not our property.
conflict between parents and children. We have done well as a parent when our
Parenting is not about doing lots of
things for our kids. It is about being an children learn to become responsible for
themselves.
example and mentor and allowing them
to make mistakes, learn accountability Conscious parenting is a purposeful
and responsibility because this is what
makes pleasant, trustworthy, self- journey of recognising and overcoming
motivated people. The more we do for our fears and failures, and then
becoming a more complete and
them, the less they can.
TEACH LESS fulfilled person whilst bringing up and
supporting our children to then become
Children are born mostly unhindered complete and fulfilled people in turn.
and naturally curious even though
science has discovered that there are All the best on your journey. If you have
certain neuro-chemical traits that new- any questions or wish to explore this
borns inherit from their parents, along concept further, feel free to contact me
with experiences from the mother during at michelle@achievegreatness.co.za or
pregnancy. But all things going well, visit www.achievegreatness.co.za.
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